One moment I am standing on this metaphoric mountain of joy. I feel like I’ve conquered all my demons and life is at an all-time high. A smile so big you can’t see my eyes. I laugh at myself for ever having worried. I feel so certain that I’ll never get off of this “high” on life.

Literally the next day…

Why did I leave my comfortable job?! I can’t stand this heat! Why am I breaking out?! I’ll never find my hubby with this skin. Where’s the hidden stash of chocolate? Why am I being so emotional? Is this dramatic? Why did I ever agree to stop drinking?!

Screen Shot 2018-04-07 at 12.35.22 PM.png

Have you ever had those days that completely blindsided you? A moment where you felt you had conquered the world, just to realize seconds later how unstable you really were?

This literally has been a preview of some of the more recent moments within the last months.  Granted I’ve been doing some heavy inventory of my past, rehashing emotions, abandoning certain beliefs. While simultaneously acclimating to a drastic change (moving to Australia), and living on a rather tight budget and schedule.

That’s when it hit me- I am purifying myself. I’m transitioning.

Screen Shot 2018-04-07 at 12.36.01 PM.png

I truly have been gifted with such a precious season of reflection, rest and discomfort. A season of spiritual and mental growth, of dreams, friends, and purpose. But being gifted with a season of growth means I’m having to actively give up comfort.

My life has so drastically changed that I hate to admit, but sometimes I secretly still crave a cigarette. Even though I stopped smoking years ago. The craving is purely emotional, thinking I gave up every bad habit, and now need to balance out this cleanse I’m in.

Going through a cleanse can be a Kickstarter. We cleanse our homes in the spring, we cleanse our bodies after the holidays but do we actively seek to cleanse our minds?

Here are 4 things that have helped me during my cleanse

Screen Shot 2018-04-07 at 12.40.45 PM.png

Since moving to Australia, I have seriously downgraded! Everything from my clothing, to the books I have, to the car I drive. I never really understood the advantage of downgrading until moving here. But it’s made me less concerned with my appearance, it’s helped grow anticipation for things I really want/desire and it’s brought value back to the things that I have. On top of that, my room never looks cluttered, which has made my room a safe haven for me.

Screen Shot 2018-04-07 at 12.40.11 PM

My environment has changed drastically as well. My friends are all on a path of self-discovery and desiring to achieve their highest potential. This has really helped push me forward when I’m having a difficult day. They pick me up and help me continue my race even when I am throwing tantrums. So often I’ve felt alone in my journey of bettering myself, but here I have a plentitude of people that are on a similar journey as well.

Screen Shot 2018-04-07 at 12.39.19 PM

If you’ve been to Australia, you’d get the joke that we are 10 years behind in this country. Personally, I LOVE it! If I watch TV, which has been seldom, it’s rare that I’m bombarded with hyper-sexualized ads and the music I listen to is more often than not kid-friendly. You may be thinking that that’s incredibly boring. But honestly, it’s so refreshing. The media does influence our thoughts and behaviors. If you believe to be ugly and incredibly discontent with your looks- take notice of what you are watching and who you are comparing yourself with. If you believe this is a violent world- take notice of how much of the news you watch or read. It’s ridiculous to believe that media doesn’t have an influence on our thoughts and actions since psychology is a key component of the media. Ever drive faster or more reckless when listening to a particular song? Newsflash, they do alter your behavior.

Screen Shot 2018-04-07 at 12.41.55 PM

Mindfulness is an essential practice here. I want to be a responsible creator with my life who is mindful with how I impact others as well as myself. That means taking responsibility for my thoughts and feelings by selecting, shaping and being in tune with them. It’s a muscle that either gets used or lost. Mindfulness can be practiced by noticing if you are hungry or rather thirsty. What thoughts do I feed on and why? Was my response appropriate? Do I really mean what I say?

These are just a couple of things I’ve noticed that have dramatically impacted me. I don’t recommend you do all at once. But pick one to focus on for a season and I promise you, you change your life positively.

Ps: The picture is to represent the emotional and physical fatigue I go through while detoxing. Trust me, it’ll take you on a rollercoaster.

Screen Shot 2017-11-14 at 10.08.57 PM

One thought on “Detoxing”

  1. I love your transparency and sharing your crave for a cigarette; then correlating it with an emotional reaction. I as well have quit smoking but sometimes find myself craving past behaviors when I feel like I’m losing “control”. Continue the journey. This is just the beginning and I am so excited to see you grow.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s